Thursday, July 17, 2014.
Ulcer. Husband. Cannon Ball.
Sitting here on the final day of Lake Michigan Writing Project (LMWP), I think back to how I almost didn't make it to this point. After an exhausting year, I wasn't sure that I would be up for the demand of the LMWP. At least not this summer. After a painful bout of ulcer, a gift from the school year, my dear husband wanted me to rethink my summer commitment and asked me to think about escaping from anything teacher related for the summer. I told him that I would do a trial run and check out the first two days and then decide on whether to do it or bow out and do it next summer. That was my way of telling him nicely that I would continue on with my commitment knowing that he didn't fully approve. He knew that this would be the case, but needed to say and have me hear his heart. I do love him for that. I was nervous about the sumer institute. I thought it was going to be so much additional work and I was already planning on working on curriculum an assessments this summer. But as always, I threw on my I'm gonna make the best of it cap and cannon balled right in (as per usual). |
The Hazing.
The schedule of the first week of nine hour days brought on some anxiety and I questioned whether I could do this. My mind of course went to the dramatic extreme and I doubted myself. My internal voice screamed that there was no way I could write for nine hours and that I was going to absolutely, definitely, positively, unquestionably, beyond any doubt going to fail this course (even though I wasn't going to be graded). Since I love challenges and am über competitive, I drowned the crazy, dramatic teenager voice by reasoning that this first week was the LMWP hazing for new recruits to earn their place among the TCs of the past and decided that I was going to make it. The reality was better than my imagination (not always true) and the nine hour days fluttered by as the laughter and group camaraderie (and our waistlines) grew among this coalition of teachers who reignited each other's spirits after yet another grueling school year. In a time where education and teachers are scrutinized and attacked, I would not want to be anywhere without my LMWP sisters. I was where I needed and wanted to be. Hazing complete. Initiation complete. This not-so-secret society needs to have a branding/tattoo ceremony to top off the cult feel. Thoughts? |
Princess of Technology.
I have thoroughly loved being able to guide this group to better understand and work with technology to fulfill their individual needs and purposes. As a recent graduate of Michigan State University’s Master of Arts in Educational Technology, I look at technology with a very specific lens. When we were first assigned to create a Wordpress site, I was confused by the intent because I felt as though what we were instructed to do was not the most efficient and it confused me in terms of the purpose behind our online portfolios. My masters degree and my passion for integrating technology into curriculum soared on cloud nine in this group. I never considered myself to be a "Master of Technology" let alone a "Princess of Technology.” In truth, I have always struggled with confidence and doubt. This dark cloud of doubt has been a permanent accessory that I have been chipping away at for years. I would gladly exchange it for a tiara and I feel as though this group has helped bring me one step, if not more, closer to letting that dark cloud drift away behind me. I always struggled with receiving attention, receiving compliments, or standing out even if I really wanted it or needed it. This was just not the way I was raised and I was thought that this was not the way of my life. It is amazing to see how difficult it is to break out from the teachings and influences of the past. Even though I have chosen to embrace what it means to be me and do life my way, breaking from protocol hasn't been easy. I have been working on myself as not only a a teacher, educator and lifelong learner, but as an individual as well. I have grown and many of my LMWP colleagues have helped guide me through. |
Write What We Know
I sought out to experiment and take risks with my writing. I wanted to break away from the comfort of op-ed/commentary pieces and wanted to venture into other styles. Fiction was my Mount Everest. I wanted it, but it was going to be treacherous. I had a few failed attempts (at least one a day) and I resolved to get to it before the end of summer. Then on the last day before out publication was due, I had a spark of inspiration and thought about writing it, yet attempted nothing. Then the next day, the day our publications were due, I wrote The Life of a Teenage Hypochondriac. While I am not fully happy with where it is, I am proud of it and excited to continue to work on it. It goes to show that writing cannot be forced. I tried too hard to find the material, rather than let it freely come to me. I know about psychology, I know about hypochondria and I know teenagers. We write what we know and that is what I did. I may possibly continue to follow Harrison to see what comes of his illness and his relationship with Poppy Stewart.
I sought out to experiment and take risks with my writing. I wanted to break away from the comfort of op-ed/commentary pieces and wanted to venture into other styles. Fiction was my Mount Everest. I wanted it, but it was going to be treacherous. I had a few failed attempts (at least one a day) and I resolved to get to it before the end of summer. Then on the last day before out publication was due, I had a spark of inspiration and thought about writing it, yet attempted nothing. Then the next day, the day our publications were due, I wrote The Life of a Teenage Hypochondriac. While I am not fully happy with where it is, I am proud of it and excited to continue to work on it. It goes to show that writing cannot be forced. I tried too hard to find the material, rather than let it freely come to me. I know about psychology, I know about hypochondria and I know teenagers. We write what we know and that is what I did. I may possibly continue to follow Harrison to see what comes of his illness and his relationship with Poppy Stewart.
Reading Gains Credibility
A teacher's reading life is vital. Teacher's need to be reading books with students, but must also invest in reading professional books. I appreciated the time dedicated to building professional teacher reading lives. This portion was so important because it provides the theoretical and pedagogical framework for the practices we have observed, adopted or been curious about. Research is an important piece of being effective instructors, whether it is of writing, reading or any other content. This is the piece that also grants us credibility from the administration level. While most of the time it feels like a dog and pony show of all the buzz words and big names, there is merit to knowing the research, practices and practitioners which we can then back up with having practiced application. I like to read professional teaching books and I appreciated the opportunity to read the books that I have been wanting to read instead of being given a book to read. |
Demo Leads to Fire Up
They say that teachers make the worst audience. It wasn't always true. I enjoyed teaching and learning together. Even though many of us fought to "get it over with", I appreciated the intentional order of demos. Each was carefully selected to go through the writing process and flowed very well. What I appreciated most about this group was that we were all equals as teachers. No one was better because of what they taught and no one's authority was questioned because of the numbers of years they have been a teacher. I loved that each of us chose something that was personal to us. My belief in community and relationships is something that I am beyond passionate about. Culture is something that needs to be rebuilt and it needs to happen in the classroom. Ever since I started teaching, I have been presenting at the Fire Up Conference about how to get noticed and land your first teaching job. I decided that this past Spring was the last time that I would speak about this as I may be outdated as things happen so quickly in education. Instead, I think I may focus on growing culture and how its worth the investment because you will see the difference it brings in student work. |
Connected Community of Collaboration
One of my favorite quotes comes from Margaret Mead - "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world; indeed, it's the only thing that ever has." I believe in collaboration and community because it makes me a better person. I cannot learn by myself. I don't know much by myself, but my knowledge is endless when I am in a community. The resources that I learned just from the ladies of this group has blown my mind. I have learned resources like NewsELA, which can definitely help me with my Article of the Weeks. Not only have I added resources, but I have a group of supportive educators who I can always rely on. We are connected through the LMWP connection and I am confident that we will continue to carry this connection beyond our summer together. I am better, stronger, smarter, and more resourceful with my LMWP people. |
Moving Forward
So what now? Is it too much to say that I feel invincible? I survived and thrived during the program and I wrote a fiction piece. Well, it isn't over because nothing is ever over. I commit to continue to write and I commit to continue to challenge myself as not only a writing teacher, but a writer as well. I find myself energized for the school year to apply and experiment with how to better equip my students to be writers. How can I get my students to declare "I am a writer"? That will be my goal. While I am not entirely sure where my journey will lead, I am confident that this will not be the end of Annie Kim Sytsma. I will resurface and continue to grow as a writer. I have and will continue to introduce, invite, suggest, coerce, motivate, encourage other teachers to join the LMWP family. I guess this will mean that I will be their parent and they will be my child. =) |
Final Words
Heard enough? I'm just about done. I want to thank Kari and Susan for all their guidance and support. You both model what it means to be lifelong learners and teacher researchers. Your eagerness to learn and write beside us has built an amazing atmosphere for all of us. I appreciate your positive energy and your coffee making skills. Thank you for taking the time to organize this amazing Professional Development opportunity for us and pouring yourselves into it. I would love for the opportunity to work alongside both of you. Thank you!
Heard enough? I'm just about done. I want to thank Kari and Susan for all their guidance and support. You both model what it means to be lifelong learners and teacher researchers. Your eagerness to learn and write beside us has built an amazing atmosphere for all of us. I appreciate your positive energy and your coffee making skills. Thank you for taking the time to organize this amazing Professional Development opportunity for us and pouring yourselves into it. I would love for the opportunity to work alongside both of you. Thank you!
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